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Today’s cartoon, by Adam Douglas Thompson:

The caption reads “Me Thinking of All the Reasons I Would Plead the Fifth About My Actions During the Pandemic.” An unhappy-looking man’s thought bubble shows him screaming at a Zoom meeting, clutching toilet-paper rolls, and reclining drunkenly on a couch.

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More in Humor

Marco Rubio giving a thumbs-up.

A Mostly True History of Marco Rubio

No one knows Marco Rubio’s age. It’s part of his mystery. So is his height. Look it up. No one knows.

By Christopher Gangemi

Dog walking down the street with a dog walker.

Is Your Dog Friendly?

Why? Do you want to pet him? He doesn’t enjoy that at all.

By Ysabel Yates

An armor-clad Matt Damon, in character as Odysseus for Christopher Nolan’s “The Odyssey,” stands on the beach, with ships in the background.

The Odyssey 3: IMAXimum Impact

First came Homer’s Odyssey, then Christopher Nolan’s “The Odyssey,” and now a poem in honor of Nolan’s adaptation.

By Henry Alford

 

This Week’s Caption Contest

Snail telling scary story around campfire.

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Your responses will help us select three finalists.

The final three.

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The winner.

See who won (finally).

 

More from The New Yorker

Illustration of a mirror and a G.P.S. pin, with a fish pattern in the background.

Annals of Inquiry

G.P.S. and the Lost Art of Getting Lost

A new book, “Little Blue Dot,” by Katherine Dunn, raises questions about the unintended consequences of knowing where we are.

By Shayla Love

Patrick Clancy.

Annals of Psychology

A Husband in the Aftermath of His Wife’s Unfathomable Act

Patrick Clancy’s wife killed their children during a postpartum mental-health crisis. Prosecutors describe a clear-headed scheme, but Clancy says, “I wasn’t married to a monster—I was married to someone who got sick.”

By Eren Orbey

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